Unlocking Insights into ADHD and Autism: A Personal Journey
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Chapter 1: Understanding My Neurodivergent Mind
Living with both autism and ADHD often feels like navigating a world without clear instructions. The societal guidelines I received seem mismatched with my reality. Over the past three years, I’ve sought guidance from the neurodivergent community, emerging research, and my personal experiences to craft my own 'user manual.' Here’s what I’ve come to learn and accept about my unique cognitive processes.
Section 1.1: The Challenge of Motivation
Do you ever wake up feeling unmotivated, where nothing seems interesting? This is a common occurrence for me due to my ADHD and autism. When I'm stuck in this rut, I recognize the need for a specific catalyst to kickstart my brain. Unfortunately, there’s no guaranteed method to ignite that spark; what works on one day may not work the next.
For example, some mornings, a simple cup of coffee might energize my neurons. Other times, a walk outside or a message from a friend can be just the stimulus I need. Interestingly, today it was the mundane task of folding laundry that finally got me moving.
Typically, the common advice is to tackle the hardest task first—often dubbed 'eating the frog.' However, my brain requires a different approach; I must first engage in an activity that boosts my dopamine levels or, as some suggest, activates my brain's default mode network.
The first video, "Secrets of the ADHD Brain, Revealed," delves into the core symptoms of ADHD and how to harness strengths in daily life.
Section 1.2: Overcoming Paralysis
When I find myself immobilized by autistic inertia or ADHD paralysis, a small part of my brain attempts to help me escape the situation. Unfortunately, the rest of my mind is often resistant.
"How about making a colorful to-do list?" I might think. But the motivation is lacking. Even suggesting I record a podcast feels like too much effort. During these moments, I focus on finding one small task to initiate momentum.
Recently, while overwhelmed and preparing for a house move, I felt paralyzed by stress. I kept taking naps, convinced I had no time for anything. However, I soon realized that the best course of action was to tackle the task that would alleviate the most stress. It sounds simple, yet I found myself staring at an insurmountable list of chores.
The breakthrough came when I decided to sort through my belongings instead of succumbing to the chaos. Within ten minutes, my mood shifted, and I felt an unexpected surge of creativity, allowing me to progress on both personal and client projects.
Chapter 2: Recognizing and Challenging Internal Criticism
The second video, "Unlocking Success with ADHD: Embrace the Power," offers insights on managing ADHD challenges while embracing its unique strengths.
I often grapple with feelings of guilt. After a physically demanding task, I might find myself seated, watching someone else continue to work. In these moments, I have to remind myself that I am not lazy; I’ve simply exhausted my mental and physical resources.
Understanding that fatigue and executive functioning challenges are not personal failings is crucial. I may forget things frequently, even basic items like oats on my grocery list. This is a part of my daily reality that I’ve learned not to judge.
My interests ebb and flow like the tide. This 'shiny object syndrome' is a hallmark of ADHD; I dive headfirst into new hobbies only to abandon them shortly after. Gradually, I’ve accepted that inconsistency is a natural aspect of my life, and I no longer beat myself up for it.
As I continue to navigate my neurodivergent existence, I recognize that everything often takes longer than anticipated. Yet, there are moments of clarity and efficiency that surprise me, reminding me that progress is possible.
Burnout is a genuine concern, especially after years of pushing myself without understanding my neurodivergence. The transition to motherhood and the responsibilities it entails heightened my fatigue. Now, I am learning the importance of rest and recovery to maintain my well-being.
Grieving the past self who aspired to achieve what now feels out of reach has been a necessary process. It requires time, space, and a balance of engaging in activities that nurture my spirit.
In conclusion, while the journey is fraught with challenges, I’ve also discovered the power of adaptive neuroplasticity. By creating supportive environments and setting boundaries, I’m learning to thrive within my unique wiring.
If you found this exploration valuable, feel free to show your support or engage with my work. For more insights, check out my book, 'The Wild Wandering Arc: A Journey Through Vanlife, Nature & Love.'